Decided that leaving K for the day and going to see my family wasn’t going to happen. Saturday 11am we did an NHS 111 form with a callback expected in an hour. The call came at 2.50pm and after a chat they said a doctor would call.

We all watched ‘The Holdovers’ as it is kind of Christmasy. And a Star Wars series that is on Disney, trying to get it done before the Disney cancellation kicks in – victim of the recent budgeting exercise.

K got up and floor squeaked a lot – ‘excuse you!’ I joked, but he didn’t smile. ‘That wasn’t me!’ he said indignantly. He’s usually good for a joke so it’s probably just feeling ill that has bypassed his funny bone.

In the night he was unsettled. He asked me to help change his t-shirt and turn the duvet over as he had been hot and they were wet. Once done he lay down again and he spoke about putting a deposit down for a holiday, ‘something to look forward to’.

Sunday morning at 10am they called to say sorry they hadn’t been in touch but someone would call. Eventual call came at 2pm but, for some reason, my phone was on silent and we missed it, and the next call. Only when I checked the voicemail did I hear that they had closed the case.

I had a shower. You know when you cup your hands really tightly and try to keep the water captured there. But it finds a way out between your fingers, you can only watch as the level keeps going down.